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15 måder at give en kat en pille... *loool~
Fra : Sofie Iversen


Dato : 18-04-03 15:46

Fifteen Ways to Give your Cat a Pill--



First-- Wrap the pill in bacon.


1.. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm, as if
holding a baby. Position right fore finger and thumb on either side of
cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks, while holding pill in
right hand. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.

2.. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in
left arm and repeat process.

3.. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.

4.. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear
paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of
mouth with right fore finger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.

5.. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call
spouse from garden.

6.. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and
rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head
firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill
down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.

7.. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap.
Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep
shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing
later.

8.. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just
visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force
mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.

9.. Check label to make sure pill is not harmful to humans, drink one
beer to take taste away. Apply bandage to spouse's forearm and remove
blood from carpet with cold water and soap.

10.. Retrieve cat from neighbour's shed. Get another pill. Open another
beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door into neck to leave head
showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat
with elastic band.

11.. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges.
Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold
compress to cheek and check records of last tetanus jab. Toss back
another shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.

12.. Ring fire department to retrieve cat from tree across road.
Apologize to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid
cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.

13.. Tie the little bugger's front paws to rear paws with garden twine
and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves
from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak.
Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour one litre of water down
throat to wash pill down.

14.. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to emergency
room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes
pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order
new table.

15.. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and ring local pet
shop to see if they have any hamsters.

HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL !!!

1.. Wrap it in bacon...............





Med venlig hilsen
Sofie Iversen
- Tøm kattebakken ved privat svar


Postet fra http://www.dk-fritid-dyr-kat.dk


 
 
sn67 (18-04-2003)
Kommentar
Fra : sn67


Dato : 18-04-03 19:47

LOOOOOOOOL !!!
Det var sgu' dagens højdepunkt, undskyld sør'me dagens højdepunkt!
/Susanne



"Sofie Iversen" <lindberg_dkKATTE@BAKKEhotmail.com> skrev i en meddelelse
news:3ea00f91bb151@dk-fritid-dyr-kat.dk...
> Fifteen Ways to Give your Cat a Pill--
>
>
>
> First-- Wrap the pill in bacon.
>
>
> 1.. Pick cat up and cradle it in the crook of your left arm, as if
> holding a baby. Position right fore finger and thumb on either side of
> cat's mouth and gently apply pressure to cheeks, while holding pill in
> right hand. Allow cat to close mouth and swallow.
>
> 2.. Retrieve pill from floor and cat from behind sofa. Cradle cat in
> left arm and repeat process.
>
> 3.. Retrieve cat from bedroom, and throw soggy pill away.
>
> 4.. Take new pill from foil wrap, cradle cat in left arm holding rear
> paws tightly with left hand. Force jaws open and push pill to back of
> mouth with right fore finger. Hold mouth shut for a count of ten.
>
> 5.. Retrieve pill from goldfish bowl and cat from top of wardrobe. Call
> spouse from garden.
>
> 6.. Kneel on floor with cat wedged firmly between knees, hold front and
> rear paws. Ignore low growls emitted by cat. Get spouse to hold head
> firmly with one hand while forcing wooden ruler into mouth. Drop pill
> down ruler and rub cat's throat vigorously.
>
> 7.. Retrieve cat from curtain rail, get another pill from foil wrap.
> Make note to buy new ruler and repair curtains. Carefully sweep
> shattered figurines and vases from hearth and set to one side for gluing
> later.
>
> 8.. Wrap cat in large towel and get spouse to lie on cat with head just
> visible from below armpit. Put pill in end of drinking straw, force
> mouth open with pencil and blow down drinking straw.
>
> 9.. Check label to make sure pill is not harmful to humans, drink one
> beer to take taste away. Apply bandage to spouse's forearm and remove
> blood from carpet with cold water and soap.
>
> 10.. Retrieve cat from neighbour's shed. Get another pill. Open another
> beer. Place cat in cupboard and close door into neck to leave head
> showing. Force mouth open with dessert spoon. Flick pill down throat
> with elastic band.
>
> 11.. Fetch screwdriver from garage and put cupboard door back on hinges.
> Drink beer. Fetch bottle of scotch. Pour shot, drink. Apply cold
> compress to cheek and check records of last tetanus jab. Toss back
> another shot. Throw T-shirt away and fetch new one from bedroom.
>
> 12.. Ring fire department to retrieve cat from tree across road.
> Apologize to neighbour who crashed into fence while swerving to avoid
> cat. Take last pill from foil wrap.
>
> 13.. Tie the little bugger's front paws to rear paws with garden twine
> and bind tightly to leg of dining table, find heavy duty pruning gloves
> from shed. Push pill into mouth followed by large piece of fillet steak.
> Be rough about it. Hold head vertically and pour one litre of water down
> throat to wash pill down.
>
> 14.. Consume remainder of scotch. Get spouse to drive you to emergency
> room, sit quietly while doctor stitches fingers and forearm and removes
> pill remnants from right eye. Call furniture shop on way home to order
> new table.
>
> 15.. Arrange for SPCA to collect mutant cat from hell and ring local pet
> shop to see if they have any hamsters.
>
> HOW TO GIVE A DOG A PILL !!!
>
> 1.. Wrap it in bacon...............
>
>
>
>
>
> Med venlig hilsen
> Sofie Iversen
> - Tøm kattebakken ved privat svar
>
>
> Postet fra http://www.dk-fritid-dyr-kat.dk
>



Niels Peter (18-04-2003)
Kommentar
Fra : Niels Peter


Dato : 18-04-03 20:30

sn67 wrote:

> sgu' dagens højdepunkt, undskyld sør'me

Er der noget, jeg har misset - må vi ikke bande herinde mere?

--
Niels Peter
www.bluewhite.dk
Cats Are People, Too!


Lisbeth Hviid Jakobs~ (19-04-2003)
Kommentar
Fra : Lisbeth Hviid Jakobs~


Dato : 19-04-03 19:22

Jeg har den på min hjemmeside i en dansk version, hvis nogen er interesseret


Og ja, den ER sjov

~Lisbeth



Lisbeth Hviid Jakobs~ (19-04-2003)
Kommentar
Fra : Lisbeth Hviid Jakobs~


Dato : 19-04-03 19:49


"Lisbeth Hviid Jakobsen" <Lisbeth@cutiecats.dk> skrev i en meddelelse
news:b7s3vt$pj3$1@sunsite.dk...
> Jeg har den på min hjemmeside i en dansk version, hvis nogen er
interesseret
>
>
> Og ja, den ER sjov

bleh ku' være jeg også skulle komme med et link?
http://cutiecats.dk/pille.shtml

~Lisbeth



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